I'm on the outside looking in

Standing on the outside
never let in
why do i always seem to choose them?
emotionally unavailable
held at arms length
always taking
never giving
it's always the same thing.
I'm on the outside looking in.
Why don't they see me?
Why can't they feel?
Why do they hurt me?
It's so unreal.
It's come around again
I stand before you
You say you may never feel the same things for me
yet here I go again
jumping right in
hoping and pleading
please let him see me
please let him feel
don't let him hurt me
let this one be real
Please, let this time be real!
But, it's so confusing.
Never knowing
always feeling used,
never knowing if tomorrow you'll be gone.
What do I do?
Is love really worth the risk?
Is this love at all?
Here I fall.
Again!
Fading into you, getting more confused, allowing myself to be abused.
You never lied.
Why do I keep standing on the outside looking in?
Expecting things to change....
maybe it's time for me to change?